You know a person’s passe if they use words like “icebox” – or say benches are hard, sad and cold.
The bench has evolved.
The bench has gone modern.
The bench is now cooler than most people’s couch.
They have cushions and fabric and leather and studs –
They have backs that let you sit back for real.
A bench lets you sit close without that discomfort you get from a loveseat when you’re not quite in love.
A bench lets you read or lay back and nap, so long as your legs fold and compact rather flat.
A bench lets you daydream or lace up your boots.
You can plop down for a minute or stay there for an hour.
The bench has gone wild in London and Boston,
with colorful themes and ergonomic lines.
The bench has emerged.
The bench has advanced.
The bench has, shall we say, “arrived.”
Gone are the days of the stiff wooden slats, and the metal bench – just what was someone thinking?
Hard, sad and cold is no longer in their makeup – they’ve grown up –
they’re now soft, glad and warm.
So away! with the thought of the chipped-up old bench.
Be gone! With the image of splinters and pigeon poo.
Embrace! The new breed of supple sweet benches –
Embrace them! And please have a seat.